17 year old girl | broken | fucked up

I struggle with severe clinical depression, social and general anxiety, OCD tenancies, hallucinations, anorexia, self harm and suicide. I'm just trying to get through the day without falling part further. This is my blog I'll post whatever I like on it, so at times it may be triggering. I do not promote any sort of self harm or eating disorder; Tumblr is my place where I can be myself and express the side of me that I hide all day. I'd like it to stay like that. I'm always here to talk to you about anything, and the ask is always open. You're all beautiful. You can get through this. I love you

7452) I think my parents like to keep reminding me that I am fat. They keep saying that I should be careful because obesity is a problem, and that my clothes don’t fit me anymore. Then my mother thinks that depression is an excuse for being lazy and she refuses for me to get some medical tests done…

(via eatingdisorderconfessions)

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7448) It’s not fair that I have to suffer quietly inside my brain screaming at myself and hating myself while constantly thinking about food and thinking about not eating food. Yet, I still eat it and no one knows. Am I crazy? No, I’m not. Maybe I don’t know.

(via eatingdisorderconfessions)

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thinsquids:

Literally my logic behind my ED

  • I’m already fat, I can’t eat anything today
  • I’m already fat so why not eat more
  • I feel thin today I deserve something to eat
  • I feel thin today so I’m not going to eat anything
  • I hate food I never want to even be around it
  • I’m too fat to have an eating disorder
  • I don’t deserve to recover, my problem’s not that bad
  • I love food I want to recover
  • Haha no I’m too fat to recover

(Source: emilyologist, via magicitsrealforus)

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senyahearts:

Sasha Luss - Backstage at Giambattista Valli, S/S 2014 RTW
7231) I get anxious when I see others eating healthy food because I feel like they want to lose weight and I’m afraid that they’ll lose more that me. I feel like I have to be the skinniest…

(via eatingdisorderconfessions)

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6730) I’m X, never been kissed or had a boyfriend and it makes me so sad. But then I realised that how can I except anyone to love me if I do not love myself?

(via eatingdisorderconfessions)

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6103) Every time I restrict I’m constantly in fear of the binge I know is around the corner. It’s the same every f*cking time but I never learn. I feel like I can’t possibly have an ED because I’ve never lost any significant weight.

(via eatingdisorderconfessions)

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It’s ironic that I see my eating disorder behaviours as a coping mechanism and a ‘safety net’, when the last thing eating disorders will ever be is safe

is it possible for me to recover and still lose like five stone because that would be really ideal

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